I don’t know if you read my post on Thursday, but basically I wrote about this feeling of uneasiness I’ve been trying to fight for the past little while. This inability I’ve had to focus or do any one thing at one time. With my whole new change of routine, plus more time to myself, this unrestlessness – I think – makes a lot of sense.
But regardless, by mid last week it grew to something that was just completely aggravating and I wanted it to stop. So. I finally decided I needed to be intentional about being intentional.
Thanks to a few small self care activities I’ve long neglected, some moments of stillness, and some focus back on the things that give me life….. I think I got some of that intention back.
Lyss’ post Inner Work Brings Inner Peace really resonated with me this week. Sometimes (cough most of the time cough) doing the things that give you inner peace are really hard to get yourself to do!! I know when I am anxious or jacked up, it can be a plain old “no” to sitting down to journal or meditate or focus on one thing at one time. As Lyss said, staying in those anxious thoughts or wallowing in negativity is actually taking the easy way out. Doing the things you know you need, in moments when you most need them, is work!!
Anyways. I’m still not 100% buddha over here, but I was able to at least find some moments of reprieve from the unrestlessness (and for the rest, we continue on trying). Linking up with Meg to tell you a bit about them.
I got back to my lessons! I had a coaching with my acting teacher, and as soon as I left her, I booked a lesson with my singing teacher for next week. My acting teacher helped me realize I need to sing.
Before my lesson I had a solo date with a Toris cinnamon bun. It had been far too long.
When things grew to their ultimate intolerable – I grabbed my journal, left my house, went to the McDonalds, got a latte, and just sat and wrote before heading to work. The date of my last journal entry… let’s just say that kind of time lapse should not happen again.
I felt much more grounded after this. And then I wrote a TOL post.
The next morning I went to a 7 am yoga class. It was exactly what I needed: very meditative with slow, free movements to loosen up the body and just move.
Then on my way home, I used a coupon to get myself a free latte from a little organic market down the street and brought it back home. Bliss.
Early morning yoga + latte to go = perfect morning
That afternoon I put together a big closet for our bedroom! One of the last few things we were needing to complete the move in process.
And put up a few festive bits of decor
I spent a fair bit of time on public transit this week, which means I got back to some reading!
…and some transit-reading fuel…
Sea Salt Chocolate Chip Cookie
I had yet another unplugged latte break before a work shift and put a good chunk in a play I took out from the library.
I had two commercial auditions, which – after a couple of weeks of not hearing from my agent – really raised my spirits.
I made a silly mistake in one of the auditions, which is just yet another lesson I will be taking in from here on in. But for the other audition, I got put on my first “hold.” Meaning they’ve told me I need to be available for the shoot dates but are still deciding between me and one or two other actors.
And out of the four self tapes I did last weekend, I got two of them! Ha! Of all the timing. Maybe my black eye was some sort of good luck….??
I shot a short film – a 13 hour one day shoot – which was long but I think a positive experience. And I booked a feature film that will be taping in march.
Not to treat myself, but simply because it would be delicious, I got myself a glorious vegan gingerbread donut from bloomers. Let’s just admire this one for a second.
…and maybe a bit more…
Sometimes healthy coping mechanisms don’t work. Let’s be real. And that can be disappointing and frustrating and have you questioning why you should choose them when it would be a lot less work to just stay in your discomfort or revert to a less healthy way of coping. But its the trust in the long term vs the short term that we have to remember. I hadn’t been using many healthy coping mechanisms lately – rather I was just ignoring coping mechanisms all together and letting my discomfort linger on and grow. But the only place that got me was to a level of discomfort that was frustrating and intolerable. Being intentional about being intentional – forcing those bits of self care into your day – I think has a cumulative effect. They will start to gather up a sense of grounding in you. With the help of some public transit rides, some reading, some sweet treats and doing what I love, I’m on my way back there.Being intentional about being intentional. Working on self care and bringing yourself back to grounding. #passions #relaxation #sugar #slowdown Click To Tweet
What did you do that was intentional last week?
Not a hugely exciting week. But I did get a few nice things…