Potentially triggering material in today’s post. If you find yourself sensitive to food myths and easily absorbed into food scares, please be careful when reading.
I have a really unfortunate relationship with wheat.
Well, with carbs in general, but wheat is by far the leader of the pack.
Let’s go back, oh, 7 years. I remember the afternoon quite clearly. I was browsing some random mini-mall book store with my brother and Dad when I walked past this:
…. your brain’s silent killers.
Well. For my young, increasingly disordered and susceptible brain… this was all that was needed to officially put a massive red stamp of “danger” onto all things wheat. One book, one subtitle, and that stamp has been imprinted, grudgingly not moving, in my brain ever since.
Then of course the danger signs started dropping into my brain – like quarters into a pinball machine – in every book store I entered.
….wheat will make me gain weight. *plink*
…wheat is dangerous to my health. *plink.* It will do bad things to me. *plink plink*
…NOT eating wheat will make me lose weight. *plink plink pliiinnnnnnnkk*
Wheat will make me bloat. It will put too much sugar into my body and my body won’t work it off. It only gives my body bad things. It immediately will turn into belly fat.
Society – in its truest attempts – successfully instilled the fear of wheat into me. Well done, society. Well done.
Of course as my disorder grew that fear expanded to any sorts of carbs and grains. But wheat always remained the biggest fear.
In the thick of my disorder, one serving of wheat in a day was a big thing. For example – a sandwich. A sandwich was “work out food.”
As I progressed in my recovery, two meals with wheat in them grew to be “okay.”
Now, I’m at the place where having three wheat based meals in a day is a common enough occurrence, but four would be a big – not very comfortable – thing. I know this is a fear and challenge I need to address.
But for now, I’m still working at making those days when I have three wheat based meals something that I don’t even have to think about.
I know wheat is the first thing to go away when I begin to get restrictive. The week before my parents came to visit, it definitely wasn’t a large part of my diet. So last week, not surprisingly, I found myself craving toast. Toast with peanut butter. Cereal. Even when I went out for dinner and expected to get something gluten free, all I wanted was a big ol’ wrap.
And I embraced it. With my parents here, I found myself eating wheat based meals three times a day, most days. I gave into those cravings. It was very conscious and in my thoughts – absolutely – but you know what? My anxiety decreased. My irritability decreased. My mood and happiness increased. And… it was easy, convenient and delicious.
My parents and I went out for a simple cafe breakfast before I had to send them to the airport. I had a bacon cheddar scone with 2 packs of butter and shared my Dad’s organic granola with hot steamed milk.
Cheddar Bacon Scone / Granola with Milk
There was a leftover burrito from my dinner out on the weekend. These things were MASSIVE. You know – those wheat tortillas that restaurants have that are super elasticy and probably the size of three regular wraps?
Vegan black bean burrito with avocado cream, vegan cheese sauce, tomatoes, sprouts, lettuce, tomato, cucumber / red peppers on side
and an unpictured chocolate covered toffee mini bar
Pasta is just now getting to be a safe food. But having it on a day when I also ate a scone and a wrap/sandwich!?? I actually don’t think that has happened since I was in the hospital as an in patient….wow…
Homemade Macaroni Lasagna Casserole made with shell pasta, ground turkey, 2% cottage cheese, Monteray Jack cheese, salsa, tomatoes, peppers and cilantro / steamed broccoli on side
Blueberry Quinoa Breakfast Bar / Coconut Greek Yogurt / Peanut Butter M&Ms
Now – OF COURSE – many people and many of you have gluten/wheat sensitivities, digestive issues, or even full blown celiac disease, so of course wheat is NO BUENO for you. This is an unfortunate inability many peoples’ bodies have and it is by no means easy or idealized. But I do not. I am so blessed that my body – as far as I can tell – works extremely well with wheat. So, you with sensitivities should have a certain ward against wheat, but I should not. No one without a gluten/wheat sensitivity should. I could get into all the good things wheat gives your body but this post is getting long enough already. Just go here and let’s just cap up with: essential B vitamins, manganese, zinc, iron, fibre…. energy for your brain to think.
This is as much as a lecture for me as it is to anyone else. I need to continually challenge that danger sign that is still implanted in my brain and remind myself that wheat – and carbs – are good for me. They are GOOD for me.
Linking up today for What I Ate Wednesday to celebrate the goodness of all foodsThe myths of the wheat scare. Has society tricked you, too? #realfood #health #nutrition… Click To Tweet
Has society ever succeeded in implanting wheat fear in you?
Is wheat a daily/regular part of your diet? What is your favorite way to eat carbs?
If you need to be gluten free, do you find yourself still seeking out plenty of gluten free breads and pastas?